Basic Bitch Guide to Fall

IT’S PUMPKIN SPICE LATTE SEASON BITCHEZ!!! ASSEMBLE BASICS, IT IS OUR TIME TO SHINE!!!

As soon as Starbucks releases their PSLs (aka a pumpkin spice latte for those of you who don’t know) for the season, the basic bitch in me gets SOOO excited.  I’m like white girl squealing just thinking about it.  It’s like pumpkin spice lattes are my spirit animal or something.

ANYWAYS!  Besides PSLs, there are many other basic bitch essentials required for you to be able to truly celebrate fall in the best, most basic way possible.

So, I decided to make a guide of all the basic bitch essentials for the fall season:

PUMPKIN SPICE LATTES

If you aren’t holding a pumpkin spice latte in your hand at ALL times, are you even a basic bitch during the fall?  Nope.  TRY AGAIN HOE.  THIS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT STEP!

UGG BOOTS

The ultimate boots with the fur.  There is no other feeling as good as slipping into some new sheepskin boots.  THESE ARE ESSENTIAL TO YOUR FALL OUTFIT!  One cannot be a basic bitch without her Uggs. inserts sassy girl emoji

OVERSIZED SWEATERS

Ahhh, sweater weather.  There’s nothing cuter than a girl in her oversized sweater.  Comfy and trendy.

PUMPKIN PATCHES

INSTAGRAM OPPORTUNITY PEOPLE!  What’s cuter than a basic bitch sitting in a patch of pumpkins?  NOTHING!  These posts will always be a hit on your IG feed. YOU ARE WELCOME!

SCARVES

Scarves can go with pretty much any outfit.  This accessory literally screams IT’S FALL!  Plus, they’re a great way to hide your hickies (for all you fellow hoes out there).

SLUTTY HALLOWEEN COSTUME

Mean Girls nailed this concept.  If your costume isn’t as revealing as my bottle service outfit, YOU ARE DOING IT WRONG!  The more ass and tits, the better.  Slutty police officer?  Yes.  Slutty firewoman?  Yes.  Slutty nurse?  Oh yes.  Slutty angel or slutty devil?  Duh.  Slutty school girl?  Of course.  Slutty anything-with-animal-ears? UM, OBVIOUSLY YES!  A bunny or a cat are both prime examples of this, in case you couldn’t figure it out yourself.

As Mean Girls (aka the Basic Bitch Bible) so eloquently put, “Halloween is that one time of the year that a girl can dress like a slut and no one can judge her.”

ANYTHING PUMPKIN SPICE

Pumpkin spice is THE flavor of fall.  If you aren’t purchasing everything you see that has to do with pumpkin spice, you are a basic bitch let down – GTFO.   Pumpkin spice lattes, pumpkin spice scented candles, pumpkin spice soap, pumpkin spice cookies, pumpkin spice ice cream, even effing pumpkin spice perfume if you can!  The more pumpkin spice, the better.

Wishing you all the most basic, pumpkin-spice-filled fall ever!  Xx

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